Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
it was like eating out sand paper
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
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