Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
Come share oat with me in your robe
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
