My boss' voice literally gives me gas
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
Randomize
