How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
Boobs are out for the taking
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
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