she said she was living bicuriously through me.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
I am mentally ready for anal.
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
Randomize