I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
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