Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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