Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
Randomize
