So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
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