you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
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