oh god the rape fog is back!
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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