"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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