I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize