dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Randomize
