Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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