U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Randomize