I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
Randomize
