Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize