ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
