Don't you send me to vm
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Randomize