I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I just crop dusted the hot FedEx guy delivering my business cards...then asked him "Was that you?" How the fuck am I allowed to be an adult?
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
Randomize
