My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Randomize