I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
Banned from zoo.
Again?
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
Randomize
