is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
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