did you get engaged???
Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Randomize