I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
