I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Randomize
