well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Randomize
