You don't have asthma, your pregnant
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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