Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
Randomize
