just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
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You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
OPIZZABONMYDICK
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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