If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
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