I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
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