Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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