Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
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