Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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