Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
Randomize
