I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
