i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
Randomize
