he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
jump out the window naked night went bad
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