it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Randomize
