Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Randomize
