I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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