16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Randomize
