I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
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