yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
