guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
The best revenge is premature balding
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
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