Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
