You're so nebulous sometimes
new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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