I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
Randomize
