watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
the hot woman interviewing me is reading jokes off the back of laffy taffy.... I'm getting laid and possibly a job
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
Randomize